Modern etiquette is changing a lot. Its rules are becoming less strict and more focused on the comfort of spending time with other people. Including psychological. After all, in the modern world, concentrating on your mental well-being has become one of the key tasks.

Heather Wise-Alexander told Paper City about the 5 basic rules of modern etiquette that are indispensable in 2023. She is an expert on the rules of behavior in society and is well aware of what a well-mannered person should do. According to her, these rules are universal and will help you in all areas - in your personal and public life, at work, when communicating with family and strangers, online and offline.

According to Wise-Alexander, the new etiquette is not a list of rules on what to hold, where to stand, and where to put what items. Now the focus is on compassion and care for yourself and others. And here's how to show them properly.

Say hello

It sounds simple, but we so often forget about such simple words as "hello", "greetings", "good afternoon". Meanwhile, you need to use them everywhere and every day. If you go to a store, say hello to the salesperson, if you want to ask a passerby on the street, start with a greeting. It will take less than a second, and it will already set you and your interlocutor in a friendly mood. Saying goodbye and wishing each other a good day/evening/weekend is also a great practice.

Introduce yourself

So, you've said hello. Now, before you get to the point, introduce yourself. Imagine you're about to talk to someone you don't know. Or you are new to a group of people. Start by saying your name. Right after that, you will stop being a complete stranger to these people.

Also, introduce your companion if you brought someone new to the company. Don't worry too much about who should be introduced and in what order according to the hierarchy. The main thing is to establish contact.

And whenever you meet someone, pay attention to how they introduce themselves. Use only the name that they use. If a woman introduces herself to you as Daria, that's how you should address her. A man who introduced himself as Alexander should continue to be Alexander to you. You can call them Dasha and Sasha only after asking their permission. And, of course, after receiving it.

Stay on a positive note

This rule will probably require the most effort from you. After all, we often tend to focus on the negative and produce it even unconsciously. But when you prioritize the positive, your communication will change dramatically. This doesn't mean that you need to ignore any negative circumstances. It does mean that you will need to formulate a positive statement before addressing the negative, and you will need to formulate an "I-message", speaking on your own behalf rather than labeling.

It sounds confusing. So it's better to explain it with examples. Here are two very vivid ones:

I hate it when you're late. This sounds like an accusation, affects a person's self-esteem, and is very rude.

How to replace it? Speak for yourself. It is extremely important to me that you come on time, and I cannot compromise this principle.

I don't like it... And then literally anything can happen. It sounds like the same "I-message," but there is a nuance. It's an accusation again.

How to replace it? I would be very grateful if... I would like you to... And something like that. Do not make claims, but formulate polite requests. People like them better.

Gradually, you will master the art of formulating your negative thoughts in a way that does not hurt other people. This will greatly improve your image and people will want to be more friendly to you.

Respond quickly

Gadgets have blurred the boundaries of our private space. And now we can get a question or a remark, including work-related ones, at any time - you just get something in the messenger. It is rude to leave this remark unanswered. However, you shouldn't always drop everything you're doing for a chat either. So respond as quickly as you can. Some experts say that you should respond to work messages within 48 hours, and personal messages within 8 hours. If someone asks you something that requires you to delve into the subject matter, reply that you've seen the message and will get back to them as soon as you're ready. Remember: ignoring is a form of rudeness.

Say thank you often

It's always nice to receive gratitude for any service, even the smallest one. So thank people for anything they do for you. Even if it's something very small. The word "thank you" and a light smile will always be appropriate. For significant services and favors, you can write a thank-you note or send a card. People like to be appreciated for their efforts. Keep this in mind and the quality of your relationship with them will quickly improve.

Earlier, OBOZREVATEL talked about the rules of modern table etiquette, which are suitable for both business lunches and informal meetings.

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