Polite compliments that are actually offensive: 10 cases

Julia PeschanskayaLife
Rules of etiquette. Source: Pexels

A compliment is a pleasant word aimed at praising a person and cheering them up. But, unfortunately, not everyone knows how to do it properly, even though it seems easy.

There are often situations when kind compliments actually hurt a person's feelings. That's why OBOZREVATEL has compiled 10 phrases to avoid.

"You look like you've lost weight"

You should not comment on a person's appearance, especially their weight. You don't know what the person went through to get rid of those extra pounds, maybe they were sick or stressed. Such a statement can remind you of an unpleasant period and undermine your self-esteem.

Or, perhaps the person was the same weight as before, and your compliment may indicate that they still need to lose weight. It is better to refrain from such phrases.

"You look good for your age"

Commenting on age is another risky topic to avoid. Because such compliments can offend a person. It implies that the person only looks good in comparison to others of their age. Better to say: "You look good" and don't add the rest of the sentence.

"You are so smart for a woman" or "You are so fashionable for a man"

Such a rude compliment belittles the feelings and capabilities of both women and men. There is no need to divide people and think stereotypically. In the modern world, men and women have long been able to perform different duties. Therefore, you should not emphasize what you think is more suitable for the opposite sex.

"You're so handsome, why aren't you married yet?"

This is another comment that, at first glance, does not carry any negative meaning. But asking someone why they're single is never appropriate, even if you soften the question by giving a compliment.

"You deserve better than him/her"

This is a phrase you often hear when friends or family support you after a breakup. But this phrase has a completely different meaning than you think.

It may be nice to hear, but the person was with their partner for some time and had feelings for them. Therefore, saying that they deserve better means that the previous relationship was the wrong choice. Divorce is a difficult period, and criticizing another person is not always correct.

"You look good."

At first glance, this phrase may seem nice, but in reality it means that the person usually does not look good enough to be complimented. This undermines self-esteem because they start to think that their everyday appearance is not up to par.

"I don't know how you like all this stuff"

Every person has different tastes, so you shouldn't focus on what others like and what you don't approve of. This can apply to food, perfume, or clothing style. It's better to keep quiet in this situation if you don't like the way your friend or acquaintance looks. For them, this outfit may be one of their favorites.

"You look like someone else..."

Telling someone that they look like a celebrity is not always appropriate. It may not always be taken as a compliment. You may think that an actor or singer looks good, but another person may have the opposite opinion.

"You look great now"

When giving compliments, avoid the word "now". This word implies that someone used to look bad, but right now, they look better. Such a comment looks more like criticism.

"You're so brave to wear that"

When it comes to clothes and style, we all have our own preferences. So it can be perceived as an insult if you tell someone that they are "brave" for making a certain "fashionable" choice. Although it sounds like a compliment, and you may really mean it, telling someone they are brave implies that they are dressed in a way that is unusual and unacceptable in today's world.

Earlier, OBOZREVATEL published etiquette rules that will help you politely end a friendship.

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