How to make the right choice and not regret anything. 5 tips from a psychologist
If a person is faced with an important choice that can significantly affect their life, it becomes difficult for many to take responsibility. American clinical psychologist and PhD Mira Branca believes that this is a normal reaction of the psyche, and that weighing the pros and cons will help you make a decision.
In the radio program The Lisa Valentine Clark Show, an employee of Duke University (USA) spoke about five rules that can help you approach problems more responsibly. These tips will help you not to pass up truly life-changing opportunities.
1. Realize that there is no perfect opportunity
Brancu compared opportunities to the work of abstractionists who create multifaceted works. Each person will see their own pros and cons of the decision, just as they see their own meanings in intricate paintings. For example, the ideal work will be different for everyone.
The main thing is to understand what exactly you mean by the "right decision" and define clear criteria. The psychologist advises you to accept a new opportunity if it satisfies you by at least 60%.
2. Setting the boundaries of freedom
When the usual way of life changes - including for the better - most people will pay attention to even minor negative details. A person feels uncomfortable when he or she finds himself or herself in a new environment. You can get used to it if you do not cross your basic boundaries (needs, principles, etc.).
For example, to avoid disappointment in career decisions, Brancu advises prioritizing four points
- distance of work from home
- remuneration of labor
- type of work;
3. You can create opportunities yourself
If you just sit and wait, nothing is likely to change. The psychologist noted that taking the first step towards change is always difficult, but this is how most people find a good job, change their occupation, or build strong relationships. In addition, such opportunities will be valued even more.
4. Trust in the "signs" given by the body
Brancu believes that the body gives us signals when we are doing something wrong. For example, if you often experience migraines, drowsiness, and loss of energy, the reason may not be just a busy schedule. It could be a mental reaction to constant dissatisfaction.
If the reason is work, the condition usually returns to normal after a vacation. This can be a signal that it's time to change something.
5. You can start with small changes
Before you rush headlong into what seems like a lifelong endeavor, spend more time researching and start gradually. For example, your dream job may not be that good. If you start working part-time in this area without spending all your time on it, you can imagine your responsibilities and other nuances in more detail.
In addition, it's worth remembering that high expectations at the beginning of the journey will quickly lead to disappointment.
Earlier, OBOZREVATEL told you what five topics psychologists call "forbidden" when communicating with a man. It's better not to start such conversations without serious reasons, and if you do, be very careful.