Etiquette rules on how to make a delicate remark to someone without offending them
We often choose tactful silence over a delicate remark. A stain on your clothes, leftover food between your teeth, bad breath, a very strong perfume, a habit of talking too loudly or slurping at the table: situations may be different and sometimes you really can't do without a remark.
Psychologists advise to speak directly but politely: "Sorry, I do not want to offend you (you), but...". OBOZREVATEL analyzed whether the rules of etiquette imply such a choice of words and how to make a delicate remark.
Rule 1: No hints
It is better to make direct and tactful remarks to a person as resorting to hints may be very offensive. For example, you should not give a colleague deodorant, even if his clothes constantly smell of sweat. Do not offer chewing gum if the interlocutor has bad breath. Sometimes hints may remain unclear but most of the time they offend much more than the truth.
Rule 2: Discuss personal matters in private
Make sensitive remarks only when you are alone with the person. Don't put anonymous notes on a colleague's desk or talk about shortcomings in front of the entire team. This can hurt the person. In some cases, a tactful text message will be appropriate. For example, you can inform a woman about the arrow on the stockings.
Rule 3: Tactfulness
Imagine yourself in another person's shoes. Be polite and friendly. Never mock or exaggerate the problem.
Rule 4: Offer to help
According to the rules of etiquette, you should not spend too much time developing an unpleasant or uncomfortable topic for the interlocutor. You just have to infrom them about it. If they ask for help, you can give advice. For example, "I have a doctor I know" or "I know an effective way".
Rule 5: The right time
Choose the right occasion to comment. If you see that a person is having a hard day or may react very emotionally, it is better (if possible) to stay quiet.
It is always uncomfortable to talk about such things. Think about what is better: leaving a person in an awkward situation or helping your neighbor to solve the problem.
Earlier OBOZREVATEL shared whether it is possible to correct someone else's speech errors.