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12 questions you should never ask a man: relationships will be ruined

Irina ShenierLife
12 questions you should never ask a man: relationships will be ruined

Life and relationships are a complex maze where it is important to be able to avoid sensitive topics, especially when it comes to communicating with men. Women, just like men, want to be understood and respected, but sometimes when we ask questions, we can unintentionally trigger negative emotions in our partner. In particular, there are questions that can be particularly sensitive for men.

My name is Iryna Chenier, I am a women's psychologist and crisis counselor, and in this article I propose to consider the top 12 questions that are best avoided and why it is important to maintain harmony in relationships.

Women are like detectives, and very often, like the best detective, we try to check the archives of our partner's past. By discussing topics ineptly, we can find ourselves on the path to misunderstandings. In particular, there are issues that can be particularly sensitive for men, especially in the early stages of communication and relationships. Knowing these issues will make it easier for you to avoid them, and I'll explain why this is important below.

A woman's tactfulness is manifested in the ability to choose the right words and avoid questions that can lead to misunderstandings. Let your rhetoric be a gentle song that envelops a man's heart, and you will definitely create a special moment that will be remembered by both of you.

1. Do you think about your ex?

This question may give the impression that you are not confident in yourself and the relationship. Instead, emphasize your mutual affection and ask how you can grow and develop together.

2. Am I fat?

Bringing up physical appearance can cause misunderstandings and insecurities. Instead, thank him for the way he supports you and values you.

3. Who's better: me or your ex?

Comparing yourself to his ex can create unnecessary conflict. Emphasize your uniqueness and the personal qualities that made you special to him.

4. Isn't it expensive?

Instead of evaluating his spending, let him manage the finances and pleasant surprises. This will help him feel important and independent.

5. Why do you treat me so badly?

Instead of accusing him of mistreatment, express your feelings and needs to find a way to improve the relationship together.

6. Are you cheating on me?

Suspicions can cause negative emotions. Instead, have an open dialog about your relationship and needs, and try to find mutual understanding.

7. Why aren't you married/have children yet?

The question of marriage and children can cause stress for a man if he has not yet resolved these issues for himself. Everyone has their own path and pace of life, and pressure in these matters can affect his self-esteem and relationships.

8. Have you been with many women?

This question can create unpleasant associations and cause a man to feel insecure. Instead, focus on making your relationship special and unique, not on your partner's past experiences. Maintain mutual respect and trust, and don't look for details of the past.

9. Why don't you do what I asked?

Blaming can create conflict and cause a sense of misunderstanding. Instead, discuss your needs and expectations openly, looking for compromise and joint solutions.

10. Why don't you call (or write) me?

This question may make a man feel guilty or obligated. Instead of asking it in the form of an accusation, try this, "Is everything okay? Are you busy with something?" This question indicates your concern and interest in his life without putting him on the defensive.

11. Am I better at sex than your ex?

This question can cause unpleasantness and heavy emotions, especially if the man does not want to compare his previous and current relationships. Instead, try this, "Is there anything you would like to try or change about our relationship?". This question encourages an open dialog about wishes and preferences, without leading to misunderstandings or comparisons. It is important to emphasize working together on intimacy rather than comparing it to previous relationships.

12. Do you love me?

This question is key in a relationship, but it can cause anxiety, especially if it puts a man in an uncomfortable position. It is better to replace this question with, "How do you feel about our relationship? What do you like about it?". This question allows you to openly discuss feelings and emotions without excessive tension. It is important to listen to the answers, understand each other, and build mutual understanding in the relationship.

Life hack:

Sometimes, in order to build a relationship, the key is not only what you ask but also how you do it. Here are some life hacks that will help you accomplish this task with ease:

  • Ask questions in a positive way. Instead of asking, "Why aren't you doing what I asked you to do?", you can say, "What do you think about the idea of a night out?" This way, you create an opportunity for open discussion without feeling criticized.
  • Use "we" instead of "you". Instead of "Why are you always like this/not like that?", you can say "How can we improve our relationship?". This will create a sense of shared responsibility and support.
  • Combine questions with positive experiences. Instead of "Why do you spend so much time on this hobby/interest?", you can say, "What do you love about your hobby?". This way, you allow them to share the positive aspects of their interest.
  • Ask questions that expand horizons. Instead of "Why aren't you married/have children?", you can say, "How do you see your future in terms of relationships and family?". Such a question not only opens the door for discussion but also allows you to consider the topic more broadly.

Questions are a tool to keep the conversation going. However, it's important to use them in a way that opens up the relationships rather than creates tension. Try these life hacks and you will feel your relationships become more harmonious and full of mutual respect.

To summarize, I emphasize that it is important to understand that relationships are built on mutual respect and openness. By avoiding issues that may offend a man, you create the basis for a strong and healthy relationship. Allow yourself and your partner to be yourself and mutually support each other in different areas of life.

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